Distinguishing True Friends

Table of Contents

• Honesty and Criticism
• Dangers of Flattery
• Equality and Candor in Friendship
• True Friendship Beyond Material Gains
• Other

Honesty and Criticism

The one who praises you is a thief. The one who criticizes you is your true friend.

Honest criticism is a mark of true friendship but flattery leads astray.

One of the surest evidences of friendship that one individual can display to another is telling him gently of a fault. If any other can excel it, it is listening to such a disclosure with gratitude, and amending the error.

The noblest part of a friend is an honest boldness in the notifying of errors. He that tells me of a fault, aiming at my good, I must think him wise and faithful--wise in spying that which I see not; faithful in a plain admonishment, not tainted with flattery.

The flatterer's object is to please in everything he does; whereas the true friend always does what is right, and so often gives pleasure, often pain, not wishing the latter, but not shunning it either, if he deems it best.

Regard as your most faithful friends, not those who praise everything you say or do, but those who criticize your mistakes.

Abhor flatterers as you would deceivers; for both, if trusted, injure those who trust them. If you admit as friends men who seek your favor for the lowest ends, your life will be lacking in friends who will risk your displeasure for the highest good.

The noblest part of a friend is an honest boldness in the notifying of errors. He that tells me of a fault, aiming at my good, I must think him wise and faithful – wise in spying that which I see not; faithful in a plain admonishment, not tainted with flattery.

The flatterer’s object is to please in everything he does; whereas the true friend always does what is right, and so often gives pleasure, often pain, not wishing the latter, but not shunning it either, if he deems it best.

Dangers of Flattery

Friend & flatterer are two different human beings. Open your eyes & recognize the difference.

Flattery is the enemy of a real friendship.

Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog. Food for thought is no substitute for the real thing.

Flattery is like friendship in show, but not in fruit.

Compliments win friends, honesty loses them.

For nowaday deference gets you friends, honesty gets you hated

Abhor flatterers as you would deceivers; for both, if trusted, injure those who trust them. If you admit as friends men who seek your favor for the lowest ends, your life will be lacking in friends who will risk your displeasure for the highest good.

Flattery makes friends and truth makes enemies.

Equality and Candor in Friendship

Candor is a compliment; it implies equality. It's how true friends talk.

If you want to be my friend, I prefer honesty to fake praise. I was never one to run with the wolves.

It is not for minds like ours to give or to receive flatter; yet the praises of sincerity have ever been permitted to the voice of friendship

To hear complaints with patience, even when complaints are vain, is one of the duties of friendship.

It is no flattery to give a friend a due character; for commendation is as much the duty of a friend as reprehension.

It is not for minds like ours to give or to receive flatter; yet the praises of sincerity have ever been permitted to the voice of friendship.

Candor is a compliment; it implies equality. It’s how true friends talk.

True Friendship Beyond Material Gains

You didn't need to speak sweetly and offer patronage at every turn to these people. You had to be honest with them and show that they had more to gain from your friendship than your enmity.

The friendship between officers is tarnished by the need for one or another to be promoted. The kindness of a captain is predicated on the obedience and efficiency of his underlings.

Adversity tests the sincerity of friends

People who plead with you for favours May eventually prove to be great flatterers. Your friends are only those Who all the time cheerfully support Your heart's aspiration-flames.

There is almost a touch of condescension in the act of hiring friends that secretly afflicts them. The injury will come out slowly: A little more honesty, flashes of resentment and envy here and there, and before you know it your friendship fades. The more favors and gifts you supply to revive the friendship, the less gratitude you receive.

The persuasion of a friend is a strong thing.

The mockery of friends is affectionate, and inoculates against foolishness.

Bill handed me an envelope. I handed it back to him. I told him, “I’ll do a friend a favor.” Russell had taught me well. Don’t cheapen yourself. “If you do a friend a favor,” Russell had said, “then sometimes he does you a favor.” Bill.

Other

First impression is not the last reflection of a true friend, so if you are head over heels for someone who just bought you a cake, you'd better think twice before devouring your misery.

He who sows courtesy reaps friendship.

One of the surest ways of making a friend and influencing the opinion of another is to give consideration to his opinion, to let him sustain his feeling of importance.

Nothing influences people more than are commendation from a trusted friend.

Adversity tests the sincerity of friends.

Flattery is like friendship in show, but not in fruit

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