Idealized Friendship Dynamics

Table of Contents

• Unconventional and Complex Friendships
• Friendship as Deep Connection and Understanding
• Friendship and Its Challenges
• Friendship as a Foundation for Success and Growth
• Other

Unconventional and Complex Friendships

It was not something you could call friendship; it was at once less and more. The sharing of such experiences created a bond and set them apart from all others. It was not something that could be told to another person. There were no words with a meaning both could understand which would impart the physical horror or the heights and depths of emotion.

Friends?'The word seemed cheap... It was never going to fully describe what we were to each other. But that wasn't what the word was doing right then. It wasn't a definition; it was a boundary. One I needed to accept.'Friends.

Being Friends with you was great but now we will be lovers.

Being friends with you was great but now we will be both friends and lovers.

If I have to question a friendship, then it wasn't a friendship to begin with.

Although nobody could ever know about our friendship, that wasn’t going to stop us from being together.

So by the time the morning came, Odysseus and I were indeed friends, as Odysseus had promised we would be. Or let me put it another way: I myself had developed friendly feelings towards him - more than that, loving and passionate ones - and he behaved as if he reciprocated them. Which is not quite the same thing.

But friendship, as defined by everyone, was alien, fallow stuff I cared nothing for. What I may have wanted instead, from the moment he stepped out of the cab to our farewell in Rome, was what all humans ask of one another, what makes life livable.

Maybe our friendship had always been about convenience – he didn’t have anyone cooler than me to play video games with.

We found out that we mutually disliked each other, and were contented with the discovery. If people are worth anything, this sort of non-liking is a very good beginning of friendship. Every good quality is revealed naturally and slowly, and is a pleasant surprise.

But would a high school romance really be worth sacrificing our friendship? No. We were better off friends.

People were acting like we were friends before we got here. We never talked that much as friends before we got here. We're competitors. That's what it comes down to.

Friendship as Deep Connection and Understanding

We didn’t want to admit it then, but we were friends. Best friends.

Without the friendship we'd never have discovered the reason we were friends.

Because there is no power on earth that could make me abandon our friendship. There is no deed you could confess so dark that it would make me forsake you. You said of us once that we were quicksilver and the rest of the world mud. We are alike, shaped by Nature in the same mold, and whatever that signifies, it means that to spurn each other would be to spit in the face of whatever deity has seen fit to bring us together. We are the same, and to leave you would be to leave myself.

That's the mark of true friends. That we might not see each other for a year but when we do it's as if we were never apart.

I never really knew anything about friendship before I was in the Army. Did you Vince?" "Not a thing. It's the best thing there is. Just About.

James's friendship meant more than any feelings I might have. That was enough. It would have to be enough.

Another of the premises of our friendship was that we loathed emotional intimacy even as we understood its necessity. Speaking with casual nonchalance about subjects that caused us great pain was our preferred workaround.

From the first time we met, we knew everything that mattered about each other, didn't we? We just knew. I guess that's what best friends are: parts of each other.

The closeness of our friendship meant we could understand what needed to be done in a way other countries would not have done so,

Our friendship was like our writing in some ways. It was the only thing that was interesting about our otherwise dull lives. We were better off when we were together. Together we were a small society of ambition and high ideals. We were tender and patient and kind. We were not like the world at all.

We were friends because we were connected together, because something in our souls called to each other, understood each other.

From the first time we met, we knew everything that mattered about each other, didn’t we? We just knew. I guess that’s what best friends are: parts of each other.

Friendship and Its Challenges

That was our friendship: equal parts irritation and cooperation.

And here was the moment. The end of it all, for civilization was merely another name for friendship, and friendship was coming to an end.

...our friendship had ripened to a point when we had already become in a way part-owners of each other.--Justine

Yeah...I finally understood it...That exchanging information...Sharing time...The act of "let's go to the bathroom together" was the holy ritual of confirming one's friendship...Until now I was an idiot doing stupid things.

Ours was a bond without resilience. We had not fought for a friendship, we had not suffered because of the lack of one. We had taken wildly divergent paths and, in so doing, we had lost each other.

We have more in common than I thought, he mused wryly. He liked the idea that, if either of them ever fell from grace, the other might be there to offer support. It’s always easier to become friends with someone you have something in common with. I just hope it doesn’t take some socially disastrous fall before she’ll consider the possibility I might be a friend.

We've disagreed, sometimes passionately. But we're still friends.

It was the same with friendship. Disagreement between friends and spouses, too had to be carefully handled. If the time you spent with friends was consumed by disagreement, then there was no room for the essence of friendship, which was a sharing of the world. And that sharing involved seeing things the same way, or at least seeing things through the eyes of the friend.

If we knew everything that was ever said about us and if at the same time we took every word at face value, we would remain friends with no one.

Despising each other as we did, we were constantly together, thereby degrading ourselves. If that is what the world calls friendship, the relations between Horiki and myself were undoubtedly those of friendship.

Being friends as in writing letters was so much easier than being friends as in living together.

You think about when you're with your friend, and you hang out with your friend. And then you go do whatever you're doing, your life. You know, and then you see your friend again. But for us, we were friends that, we would be together, and then we would go to work, which was us still again, so we were always together.

Friendship as a Foundation for Success and Growth

It became very clear to the director that it would be foolish not to use our friendship. I had tried to talk to him about it because all the relationships in the film are so, not negative, but antagonistic. There's not a lot of love going around.

We weren't friends[...]We were more like jigsaw pieces, each of us part of the same big picture. There are people like this wherever you go. They are part of the same mystery as you are, but you can't quite tell how you fit together. The world is a puzzle, and we can't solve it alone.

It meant a lot to us to have friends with us at a time like that.

Our friendship was for a common cause- secularism.

The better part of one’s life consists of his friendships. ABRAHAM LINCOLN, letter to Joseph Gillespie, July 13, 1849 Friendship is insipid to those who have experienced love.

But what galled our audience, really, is the fact that our friendship grew out of wanting to interest each other. We wanted the world to have no part in it.

A large part of our relationship was centered on our attempts to make each other laugh. I couldn’t think of a stronger foundation for a friendship. I suppose some people would find it superficial, but they’re just not funny enough to understand.

Friendship was a thing of extraordinary value, ever since it had become clear to both of them that lovers never lasted, and that families were the traps you walked into on major holidays and emerged from the next day, stuffed with carbohydrates and seething.

We always said our career was built on our friendship and that our friendship was the secret of our success. The career just happened by accident.

Other

We would never become friends with most if not all of the people with whom we have been friends for many years, if we had met them only a few weeks ago.

Was this really friendship? I have my doubts.

friendship was always contingent.

The better part of one's life consists of his friendships. ABRAHAM LINCOLN, letter to Joseph Gillespie, July 13, 1849 Friendship is insipid to those who have experienced love.

It became very clear to the director that it would be foolish not to use our friendship. I had tried to talk to him about it because all the relationships in the film are so, not negative, but antagonistic. There’s not a lot of love going around.

Maybe friendship was not as big a deal as I’d thought and I actually had lots of friends.

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